November 9, 2009

I am really thirsty. 

I have a 1.5 liter bottle of Aquafina sitting by my feet.

I can’t get it open. I have BLISTERS on my palm from trying. I cut off the ring around the bottom with a pocket knife. No avail. It seems a cap much to small for it was forced on to it by some machine much stronger than I.

I am getting ready to jab my knife in the side, to suck out the watery goodness.

And oh yeah. It was on sale for 10/$10.

So I have ten of these.

And they are all the same. 

November 6, 2009

Oh yeah. And I’m drunk in bed by 11pm because I am a stupid girl who hasn’t had a Friday night off in over 18 months. So I started drinking at 4pm, and completely missed the music circle my friends were having at their loft tonight. But I don’t care. Cause my bed is amazing and that sounds like a bunch of hippie shit anyway. And I have my cats. And Dan Akroyd.

I just found a bottle of Dan Akroyd brand chardonnay… signed by Dan Akroyd.

I really, really want to drink this.

November 5, 2009
Knowledge, Skills and Abilities Required
1. High School graduate or equivalent
2. Type 65 wpm.
3. Working experience with Microsoft Office Products.
4. Knowledge of departmental procedures, policies and operations.
5. Able to learn and become proficient on transcription and captioning equipment. Prior transcribing and captioning experience is a plus.
6. Work under minimal supervision and able to make good judgment calls when needed.
7. Able to interface with all levels of management professionally, effectively and courteously.
8. Born again with a high level of commitment to the Lord Jesus Christ.
9. A person of integrity and capable of dealing with and maintaining a high level of confidentiality.

Uh…number eight what now? 

And that is why none of my friends can get jobs.

November 4, 2009
Hired assassin. 

(There are mice upstairs;
 Max’s services have been requested. She hasn’t been outside in 7 years, so I let her practice with a cricket. Her reflexes are still sharp, but as most 14-year old cats, her stamina is…weak.)

Hired assassin.

(There are mice upstairs;
Max’s services have been requested. She hasn’t been outside in 7 years, so I let her practice with a cricket. Her reflexes are still sharp, but as most 14-year old cats, her stamina is…weak.)

Just baked chocolate chip cookies to celebrate registering for the last two classes I will ever take. 

November 1, 2009

It’s discount candy day!

October 30, 2009

I don’t think my sexy Yeti costume is going to work out.

October 29, 2009

And oh yeah, there’s a squirrel stuck in our ceiling, so that’s been keeping me up at night.

There’s a very real chance that I might be getting a full-time, pretty real job.

I thought I was having a horrible interview: I was 10 minutes late, they made me wait 90 minutes, and I was freezing so I was shaking through the whole thing.

But after a long 30-minutes, he asked me my salary requirements and told me he’d call me in a couple days to set up a meeting.

The problem is, I currently have a job where I work roughly 30 hours a week with people I LOVE. And I make terrific money. So I’d be working more hours, but be making just a little bit more money. BUT- I’d have an entire staff underneath me, I’d be working for a company that I genuinely love, and would be doing something that is closely alligned with my own morales and principles. AND I wouldn’t have to serve tables. Well, not like I do now anyway.

I know it’s too early to really be thinking about this- I haven’t been offered the job yet. I also know that with so many of my friends struggling to find work I should feel so priveleged to even have one great job. And I do.

But as much as I want the job offer, if I don’t get it, I might be okay with not having to make this decision.