I just had to retrieve my car from 4 blocks away, because I live in Hollywood, and my street was packed tight last night.
Almost immediately I see a methy-dude doing methy things walking towards me on the sidewalk. He’s taking off his shirt and shaking it off. I make eye contact with him and think about crossing over to the other side of the street. Just as we’re about to pass, he crosses over instead. Like spiders, their just as scared of you as you are of them.
A beat later, I pass a super large black dude in a fedora and blazer. He says, “Hey gorgeous. You should come with me. I’ve got some spaces available.” I don’t know what he meant, but I think I may have missed out on a career opportunity.
I’m at the corner of Hollywood and Bronson now, waiting to cross the street. There’s a blind dude waiting to cross on the other side.
He steps in to the crosswalk and immediately hits a BMW with his cane, sort of getting it stuck in the grate.
I’m a terrible person, so my immediate thought is,”He’s not very good at being blind.”
He wiggles it free and keeps walking. I make it to the other side and stop to watch and make sure he makes it across.
But oh god, does he not.
Halfway through the crosswalk he veers right out in the intersection, still walking at an angle, but so now rather than ending up on the sidewalk, he walking down the middle of the street.
I run back across street, but now, of course, the light has changed, so I am just as much of a problem to traffic as the blind dude.
I catch him between two cars waiting at the light, and guide him back on to the sidewalk. He thanked me and I kept walking.
Got my car and went to Starbucks. Ended up in line between a hot couple on a coffee date. The guy says, “I don’t ever buy groceries because I don’t eat much food.” The guy says, “I’m scared to make coffee. My mom always made it for me, and I’d rather just trust Starbucks to do it now.”
I literally can’t imagine being scared of coffee. I’m thinking he may have used the wrong word.
Drove home, got stopped at a light where a guy I used to date walked by in the crosswalk while gotye’s “Somebody I Used to Know” played on kroq. Then a new found glory song played, so, you know.
1 month ago • 1 note
